SkullTheme - Merry X-Mas
| It's Not The Kids That Are The Problem - It's The Adults!! |
| Written by Liz Marsden |
| Wednesday, 04 November 2009 09:07 |
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Am I kidding - kids that are out of control, violent, aggressive, confrontational, verbally abusive aren't a problem? That's right. I deal with them every working day. And they aren't the problem!
Am I kidding - kids that are out of control, violent, aggressive, confrontational, verbally abusive aren't a problem? That's right. I deal with them every working day. And they aren't the problem! So, I must just let them do their own thing and have no control over the class? Never - that just doesn't happen!! They're so under control they daren't speak? No, they're a happy, relaxed and contented bunch of kids. No, the more experience I gained in my work, managing problem behaviour, the more I realised (quite some time ago), that it isn't the children but the adults who are the problem. Teachers, parents, fellow professionals, Uncle Tom Cobbley and all. That's where the problem lies. I go into many schools, talk to many teachers, parents, other education professionals, and very few of them can manage children's behaviour confidently and effectively. There's almost a culture of learned helplessness in the education system - people throw up their hands in despair claiming they are powerless to act against the lawlessness of many children's behaviour. We have to ask why so many adults are not effectively managing children's behaviour. They're not unintelligent people. However, they don't have the skills or confidence to deal with the problem behaviour they're encountering almost every working day. Negativity prevails - they don't know what do to and assume they can't do anything. They offer so many reasons why it's not happening - I hear the same excuses every day... Even the professionals who go into schools giving advice on behaviour management get it wrong. One of the problems is that such people don't work at what I call the 'pointy end' - they don't actually manage children in the classroom day to day. So they don't suffer from the inadequacy of their advice. And those at the 'pointy end' are stuck putting into practise what is basically garbage - all it does is increase the problem. Children soon realise that you have no idea about controlling behaviour and have a high old time running you ragged. Read about my first day's experience in the world of extreme behaviour problems and you'll see that I know what it's like to be in that unenviable position. I do know what it's like to be out of your depth!! It's exhausting, stressful and disheartening. The great news is that you can do something about it - you can learn to manage children's behaviour confidently. Anyone can learn to do it - it's really not difficult. Get to grips with the techniques you need, practise them and use them all the time - be consistent. You'll soon become confident and the changes will astound you. The adults in society have the duty of care to ensure children are guided and controlled to enable them to become emotionally confident and self assured adults themselves. To do this we have to be skilled behaviour management practitioners to enable children to mature and be able to manage their own behaviour appropriately. About the Author: Liz Marsden manages children's extreme behaviour in the classroom on a daily basis. She trains teachers, students and classroom support workers in effective behaviour management strategies. Her highly recommended book Behaviour Bible passes on the skills that Liz has developed so successfully. Her online diary follows her work and experiences in classrooms and schools. |